The Real 5K

Inker’s been fired-up about changing his eating (and drinking) habits, working out and looking good, so when this Floppy found out how close he lived to Legacy it thought it would be a good idea to introduce him to the PAX.  And let’s invite Test Match, too!

Well, it remains to be seen if we’ll ever see those guys in the park again, but that’s how this Floppy ended up at Legacy.  The Q calendar was empty and Floppies don’t like empty Q calendars, so that’s how this Floppy ended up as the Q IN CHARGE!

 

What follows is a tale of man vs numbers.  In the beginning, there was morning, but before morning, there was…

The Dawn Patrol Warm-up

Shuffle right, back, left, run forward around 4 cones.  Repeat while explaining the workout.  Add a merkin, two merkins, three merkins, four merkins and mosey into the dawn.

The Dawn Thang

Setup 4 corners 100 meters apart.  To honor our brothers running in the Michelin 5K we ran to 50 cones for a total of 5000 meters, but to ensure we wake up stronger than our Michelin men, we added a merkin at every cone until we reached 25.  So at the 2500 meter mark we’d achieved 1+2+3+…+23+24+25 = 26+26+26+… where those three dots run into trouble with 13 so it gets special treatment.  So that’s 12*26 + 13.  Hey, it should also be 13*26-13 or 13*(26-1).  And that is how man beat the numbers.  The answer is how the numbers beat man.

After 325 merkins we’d have enough.  We switched to 10 diamond merkins and threw in some big boy sit-ups, mostly to buy time.  We finished our 5k with enough time to knock out about 100 box cutters before the Legacy Crew started turning out in the droves.  We lost PETA to his M, but Denied stayed for a double-down.  What Denied did not know, nor did Floppy, is that Floppies are tricky.

The Legacy Warm-up

This Floppy has embraced the SSH and IW as the traditional warm-up.  It’s become the calm before the storm, the candy for the baby (actually, what kind of parent *gives* candy to a baby?), the not-really-an-exercise-but-just-wait before the just-wait, so we did 10 SSH then 10 SSH then 10 IW then we did that Thang that we do.

The Legacy Thang

Setup 4 corners 100 meters apart.  To honor our brothers running in the Michelin 5K we ran to 50 cones for a total of 5000 meters, but to ensure we wake up stronger than our Michelin men, we added a merkin at every cone until we reached 25.  So at the 2500 meter mark we’d achieved 1+2+3+…+23+24+25 = 26+26+26+… where those three dots run into trouble with 13 so it gets special treatment.  So that’s 12*26 + 13.  Hey, it should also be 13*26-13 or 13*(26-1).  And that is how man beat the numbers.  The answer is how the numbers beat man.

After 325 Merkins we’d have enough.  We switched to box cutters.  After 325 box cutters we met our 5k requirement.  But we still had time for something, and although Floppies can’t bounce, they love to squat, so we slipped in another 1.2k and 325 squats with over 15 seconds to spare, because that’s how Floppies role (err, squat).

COT

• Lift up Snowden who’s struggling with sciatica and get him back out here where he belongs.
• PETA is dealing with the stresses of building a new home, I guess just getting through it without too many headaches.

Floppy says, “fill up that Q calendar or I’ll be back!”

Yes, EM, this workout really did happen.