Return of the painfully weird workouts at the Keg

  • Workout Date - 07/14/2016
  • Q In Charge - SEAL
  • The PAX - Fargo (birthday boy), Brown Shorts, T-bag, Gluten, I Try, FNG- (John T.) Biscuit, Carl's Jr., BOGO, Quaker, Whoopee, Mr. Burns, Late for Supper, and YHC
  • AO -

13 of Powdersville’s finest upstanding citizens (including 1 FNG) posted for the return Q of YHC since going out in January for full rotator cuff repair…..Okay, who am I kidding here…. maybe one or two of us are decent folk. The rest of us are degenerate perverts. And wouldn’t have it any other way. It’s no secret that we get big numbers out here at the Keg. But it’s because we are all like minded weirdos. And YHC sometimes pushes that threshold just to see what reaction I get. I was not disappointed!

Now I’ve been posting with modifications throughout my recovery and am still not 100%. But I was finally ready to spread some love to the PAX since not having Q’d in so long. They missed me. I think. Luck would have that I was actually supposed to Q a month ago. But YHC suffered a freak groin injury (yeah, it was weird). And it’s still not right.

Gloom observations: Humidity was thick as soup. Now, we have a lighted parking lot. So it’s not very dark. NOT ONE PAX noticed that I was wearing my unique Slim GoodBody tights under my shorts (they are distracted by my cones and duck call). Yes, a duck call. New guy is probably thinking “WTH?”. BOGO is awfully anxious #needtocrushhisspirit. T-bag and Whoopee already talking trash for Hurricane Valley, our newest expansion AO in Anderson. The pre-game #mumblechatter was so good that YHC didn’t even realize that it was 5:31. Thanks for keeping time there Brown Shorts. 

The warm-up:

windmills x20 IC

hillbilly x20 IC

mosey around the church (time to free the upper half of my Slim GoodBody suit). I think some are still in shock.

I Try comes in on 4 out of 6 wheels (work truck). Was pretty sure he was going to take out the six on our formation. I strip off the top to reveal the upper half of my Slim GoodBody look. #mumblechatter commences.

The Weird:

Stop at the entrance to Marathon on a nice dirt hill for some 7’s. Hand Release mericans at the base, Squats at the top. Mosey forward up. And backwards down. (almost a few ankle injuries here). Plank, Mosey.

The Weirder:

PAX finally make some great comments on my wardrobe. So I lose the shorts so they can get the full effect. WOW!

Four cones set up for some crazy eights.

Cone 1 – 20 HR Mericans

Cone 2 – 20 lunges (DC)

Cone 3 – 20 squats

Cone 4 – 20 Mountain Climbers (4 count)

Criss-cross between stations 2 and 4 at intersection (figure 8 track) and 5 burpees each time you cross diagonally. AMRAP 20 minutes.

Somehow group three and four got all jacked up on where to start and who was 3 and where was 4. Which made it even more congested at the intersection. Damn it people! #screwupawetdream

Even Weirder:

Line up on the cones. Beep (quack) test. Wind sprint 20 meters to other side of cones. Timer is run with each sprint. And each sprint gets a little less time as we go. One Quack is start. Two quacks marks time expired. If you fail to cross the line before double quack, fall of to side and 10 burpees, 20 HR merican penalty. Rinse and repeat, until all PAX are eliminated.

It gets down to BOGO and Whoopee. Both are good sprinters. Both won’t let their egos give in to the other. Both will get top honors here. Both are morons. #loveyoumeanit

Oddly enough, YHC notices that we have not had a fly over yet. But what’s even weirder is that we do get a fly over just then. YHC’s duck call has attracted the local flock of geese, and they bless us with a tower buzz (and maybe some goose shit). You can’t make this up.  10 burpees.

Weirded out:


Boxcutters x20 IC , Reverse Boxcuttters x20 IC, Flutterkick x20 IC, and a few more hand release mericans.  Aye!!!


BOGO wants YHC to confess that I cut the time short on the last wind sprint. Suck it up, Ranger. Life isn’t fair.

Welcome to our new guy John T. (Sorry, I couldn’t remember last name). Now named biscuit. Newspring is awesome. We are getting all kinds of new PAX from their staff. Keep up the good work guys. You represent your church well.

Announcements: F3 dads this Saturday at Legacy. Convergence at Star Command next Saturday. Doodle Trail run this Saturday.

Plots were made to steal the Ghost Flag back. Not take it. Steal it. Aye!!! Damn unofficial AO’s like #RabbitsinParis .

Hurricane Valley next Wednesday

Gideon House Convergence coming up. Check twitter.

Prayers made for Newspring and YHC choice in workout attire.

It’s good to be back brothers. Looking forward to leading many more of these.


SEAL out






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